The Bully In The Mirror?
Secrets and lies from my childhood held me captive for decades. They influenced my self-worth and every decision I made from the onset of my reflections upon my own self-worth until I stumbled upon a transformation discovery that changed my life. Now, I realize I created the self-limiting walls that propelled me into adulthood and bound me countless years. I lived decades dodging bullies, never realizing I was running from the bully in the mirror. I love this quote by Anais Nin. It completely describes my journey. To learn more, check out my interviews here.
One discovers that destiny can be diverted, that one does not have to remain in bondage to the first wax imprint made on childhood sensibilities. Once the deforming mirror has been smashed, there is a possibility of wholeness. There is a possibility of joy. ~Anais Nin
It was me who allowed my history to imprison me with abstract limits…and me who empowered others to steal my happiness––my future. It’s true no one can control events that seemingly befall us from out of the blue, acts of nature, disasters, and accidents. Where do you draw the line? How about education, where to live, or work? Does anyone really choose those things or are they dependent upon birthright, parental destiny or financial status?
What About Choice?
Do we choose our friends? Or are those also predestined based on the country, urban or rural area, neighborhood or surroundings that consume and direct our wellbeing or lack there of? Building victimization is easy and somewhat instinctual. Millions of people worldwide have reason to feel their destiny follows ancestral decisions, and theirs is not to question what the future holds. And rightly so, but why? Who turned the first stone?
Does history really repeat itself?
Or can we change the course of our own destiny? I believe myself blessed, despite my unsettling past. I’m an American, and I consider living in the United States as a gift bestowed upon me, not a right of passage.
I observe violence and death on television and though the visions touch my heart, I’m thankful for where I live and who I’ve become. It’s fair to say those men, women, and children living in poverty, surviving war zones, starving under the wrath of a dictator, or terrorized by regimes who hold them captive have few choices and can’t imagine aspiring to live a different life. They were born into political and religious bias and propagandized on a daily basis.
Society’s Children
As Americans, we’re walking down a dangerous path, and I’m frightened for our future generations. Why? Because I see the same kind of secrets and lies that imprisoned me through my youth and early adulthood, inching its way into our American society. Too many of us take as truth what is told to them through trusted sources. We build a frame of reference based upon what we believe to be true, and we design our lives around the frame of reference. The process is natural…human and instinctual.
What if you awakened one morning and realized your entire life was built on secrets and lies? It would change everything. That happened to me. To learn more, check out my memoir, Wingless Butterfly: Healing the Child Within. Don’t let bullies run your life––especially if your bully is in the mirror.