Live your Dreams

Happy July 4th Everyone!

Happy 4th of July! It’s Independence Day—the perfect time to take a good look at your own independence. Especially when it comes to relationships. Have you ever thought you simply attracted insincere people? If so then it’s time to look in the mirror. The truth is, many of us unknowingly have destructive dating patterns that actually attract jerks. If you keep doing the same things and expect different results, then it’s your bad. There are all kinds of agendas lurking in cyberspace, and face it, if you want to catch a certain kind of fish, you need to use the right kind of bait. To avoid the sharks, look at your hook.  
It might me helpful to ask yourself some simple questions––and be honest.
What type of man or woman are you attracted to, and more importantly, why?
Do your relationships thrive, or are they a struggle?
Do you compromise your values out of desperation to hold on to someone?
Do you mold yourself into who you think he or she wants you to be?
Consider the answers to these questions. To find real happiness, you may need to make a few adjustments.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEfIQYG5F_c&feature=watch_response[/youtube[/youtube]
It amazes me that so many people struggle to hold on to someone who doesn’t even make them happy—I was the poster child for that scenario  for a long time! Trust me, it’s a huge mistake. Having a warm body in your life is never better than being single for a while. It’s not a death sentence to be alone––you may actually find you enjoy having your own space. Besides, when you waste time with Mr. or Ms. wrong, regardless of your reasoning, you could miss Mr/Ms Wonderful. Here’s the important message, Read more “Happy July 4th Everyone!”
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The Secret To Overcoming Chemistry Addiction

Well Jake, you’re right, you would definitely qualify for jerk status, but kudos to you for identifying the pattern as well as for your desire to break it. Maybe I can help. Having been a jerk-aholic for the majority of my life––the flip-side of your coin. If you want proof, just check Amazon and read about my new book, Wingless Butterfly: Confessions Of A Recovering Jerk-Magnet––and I’m pretty sure my book trailer  would resonate. (If you’re not following what I’m talking about, read my last blog post.)

Before I proceed, a caveat to my women readers: Jake’s article is a glimpse into the male mind and is typical of the way some men think. This article should be a wake-up call, so be aware that sometimes romance can have an agenda. And to my men readers, there is a flip-side to that coin too, more than enough for a whole new blog. But today I’ll focus on Jake and my open letter to him.

 [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I38xQPMQmqo[/youtube]

Dear Jake,

The symptoms you have are classic patterns, so don’t feel like your affliction is rare. In fact chemistry addiction seems to thrive in epidemic proportions throughout the country and it infects females as well as males. We live in a ‘visual’ and ‘disposable’ society––one that advocates Read more “The Secret To Overcoming Chemistry Addiction”

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Proof: Chemistry Is Addictive!

I posted a rant yesterday about some questionable ‘expert’ relationship advice floating around the Internet and posed the question, “Is chemistry addictive.” My own opinion is an unequivocal “yes!” I can’t help but wonder what agenda the author I referred to in yesterday’s post had in mind as he penned his dating criteria, but it sparked my interest enough to do some research on my own. While there was certainly no lack of opinions, one in particular struck me. The author writes Glamour Magazine’s male dating column, Ask Jake and, though having read his last post I would probably not agree with his approach, he writes beautifully and I admire him for his candid honesty identifying his own toxic patterns––so much so that I’ve decided to take two days to not only share his post but also add my own two cents and hopefully yours as well.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5aMcOsIJKf4[/youtube]

This video discusses commitment-phobs, male and female, and some views about the issue. While it’s interesting, I have a unique spin on the topic. Today I’ll share Jake’s article and I’d love to hear your comments Read more “Proof: Chemistry Is Addictive!”

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Wingless Butterfly—The Trailer

My publisher at Aberdeen Bay says the best things in life are worth waiting for. Some people don’t believe that, but I have to say I’ve found it to be true. I think everything happens for a reason but, for me, patience has never come easily. Ha, my mom used to tell me that patience was a virtue and she got pretty upset when I stomped off saying, “Then I guess I’m just not very virtuous.” I’ve been so excited for my book to actually be released, that it’s been difficult to sit back and wait for the step by step process to play out. Those of you who know me personally can testify that I’m pretty high energy, so instead of simply waiting anxiously, I decided to focus on something a lot more fun.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SiApc7HXQ-c[/youtube]

For the last 3 weeks I have been working on my book trailer with Acosta Production’s CEO, Jon Acosta and Downstairs Studio’s Owner and Chief Audio Engineer, Drew Gibadlo. These guys are creative geniuses and Read more “Wingless Butterfly—The Trailer”

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Casi’s Radio Interview

Listen to internet radio with Black Belt Jim on Blog Talk Radio

I have had several requests to post my BlogTalkRadio interview on this site so, in case you missed the show, here it is. BTW, my book release is just around the corner and I will be taking pre-release orders through my Facebook page soon. If you’d like signed copies of Wingless Butterfly, pre-release, send me an email and watch for my Facebook announcement. Thanks to everyone for listening to the radio show and for supporting me.

Casi

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Top 20 Signs You Are Dating a Player

Don't overlook the red flag listI’ve gotten so may requests for this list recently, I decided to re-post it, so here it isthe top twenty signs of a player. Here are the red flags in black and white. You might find some things on this list amusing or amazing, but they are real and have happened to people who were supposedly in committed relationships. Enjoybut beware. The next time your sweetie displays a blatant red flag, you just might want to think twice before you dismiss it.

Here are the top 20 signs your partner is cheating or be a player: Read more “Top 20 Signs You Are Dating a Player”

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Beware of Evil Divas

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUOkBvxSoHw[/youtube]I’ve spent a lot of time warning women about players and jerks, but men can fall victim to predators too. Wolves disguised as sheep, evil divas prey on vulnerable men, typically targeting the affluent––lonely executives, widowers and seniors. While the agenda of most male players is usually sexual and motivated by self gratification; their female counterparts are more often enticed by Read more “Beware of Evil Divas”

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Can unveiling your past change your future?

Wingless Butterfly Wingless Butterfly – coming soon!

Scheduled for release Spring 2010. Here is an excerpt:

Her warning still echoed in my mind. He’s the kind of man that pulls wings off of butterflies. The faceless man had haunted me for as long as I could remember. I shuddered and clenched my eyes as tightly as I could, but the admonition refused to be silence. Read more “Can unveiling your past change your future?”

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Warning # 3–Can you Ever Really Know Someone?

Here's to choosing wiselySince I began this blog I continually receive email from women and men of all ages who identify with and find some solace my posts. While I’m happy I am reaching so many broken hearts and souls, it is disheartening to realize how many are intelligent yet unsuspecting, trusting individuals who get hurt in relationships. It seems no matter how well we think we know someone, we can still get blind-sighted. So my question is Read more “Warning # 3–Can you Ever Really Know Someone?”

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