Live your Dreams

Happy July 4th Everyone!

Happy 4th of July! It’s Independence Day—the perfect time to take a good look at your own independence. Especially when it comes to relationships. Have you ever thought you simply attracted insincere people? If so then it’s time to look in the mirror. The truth is, many of us unknowingly have destructive dating patterns that actually attract jerks. If you keep doing the same things and expect different results, then it’s your bad. There are all kinds of agendas lurking in cyberspace, and face it, if you want to catch a certain kind of fish, you need to use the right kind of bait. To avoid the sharks, look at your hook.  
It might me helpful to ask yourself some simple questions––and be honest.
What type of man or woman are you attracted to, and more importantly, why?
Do your relationships thrive, or are they a struggle?
Do you compromise your values out of desperation to hold on to someone?
Do you mold yourself into who you think he or she wants you to be?
Consider the answers to these questions. To find real happiness, you may need to make a few adjustments.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEfIQYG5F_c&feature=watch_response[/youtube[/youtube]
It amazes me that so many people struggle to hold on to someone who doesn’t even make them happy—I was the poster child for that scenario  for a long time! Trust me, it’s a huge mistake. Having a warm body in your life is never better than being single for a while. It’s not a death sentence to be alone––you may actually find you enjoy having your own space. Besides, when you waste time with Mr. or Ms. wrong, regardless of your reasoning, you could miss Mr/Ms Wonderful. Here’s the important message, Read more “Happy July 4th Everyone!”
Live your Dreams

Take A Moment-It Could Change Your Life!

Busy lives have us dashing from one appointment to the next with a seemingly endless to-do list. Life can be so hectic. We have to be here, then be there—sometimes it’s hard to slow down long enough to catch our breath and “just be”—to take time to relax, love, live and soak in the beautiful moments of our lives—like watching a sunset with someone you love, a precious moment with your child or friend. We don’t stop often enough to enjoy a rain storm, a crackling fire or waves crashing to the shore.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMUvgt8lW0E[/youtube]

We can miss wonderful moments that take our breath away—holding hands, a passionate kiss or gazing together at a starry sky. It’s those moments that are the essence of life. Goals and dreams are wonderful as long as you remember Read more “Take A Moment-It Could Change Your Life!”

Live your Dreams

The # 1 Best Gift Ever!

Children are the future. With innocent eyes and magical dreams, they touch our hearts––and sometimes try our patience. My two sons have always been my life’s greatest treasures. I wanted to give them the world, protect them from pain and encourage them to live their dreams; a gift I had never been able to open . . . until recently. I preached ad-nausium . . . okay, that’s not really a word, but you get the picture . . . I tried to tell my children to do as I say, not as I do––a daunting task, especially through the tantrums and outbursts of their teenage years. I was convinced they had no use for Mom’s incessant messages. Those of you who are really close to me––or who read Wingless Butterfly––know the trials and tribulations I went through with my boys; especially Jace. Still, I never gave up––and somewhere along the way, when I wasn’t looking, they just got it. How do I know?

A glimpse from our new home

Well, yesterday I clicked on a status on Jace’s Facebook page and Read more “The # 1 Best Gift Ever!”

Live your Dreams

Are You Insane?

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. Now, most people wouldn’t consider themselves insane, yet how often do we see people continually repeat the same patterns, while they hopefully yearn for happy endings. Like Scarlett O’Hara in Margaret Mitchell’s Gone With The Wind, they’ll “worry about it tomorrow.” Patterns drench our lives, yet most of us don’t even realize we have them. That can be good news if our habits lead to great health, financial security and incredible relationships, but what if they don’t?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGRRJW8ynR4[/youtube]

Have you ever heard people complain that they just can’t get a break? Or how about friends who Read more “Are You Insane?”

Live your Dreams

The Secret To Overcoming Chemistry Addiction

Well Jake, you’re right, you would definitely qualify for jerk status, but kudos to you for identifying the pattern as well as for your desire to break it. Maybe I can help. Having been a jerk-aholic for the majority of my life––the flip-side of your coin. If you want proof, just check Amazon and read about my new book, Wingless Butterfly: Confessions Of A Recovering Jerk-Magnet––and I’m pretty sure my book trailer  would resonate. (If you’re not following what I’m talking about, read my last blog post.)

Before I proceed, a caveat to my women readers: Jake’s article is a glimpse into the male mind and is typical of the way some men think. This article should be a wake-up call, so be aware that sometimes romance can have an agenda. And to my men readers, there is a flip-side to that coin too, more than enough for a whole new blog. But today I’ll focus on Jake and my open letter to him.

 [youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I38xQPMQmqo[/youtube]

Dear Jake,

The symptoms you have are classic patterns, so don’t feel like your affliction is rare. In fact chemistry addiction seems to thrive in epidemic proportions throughout the country and it infects females as well as males. We live in a ‘visual’ and ‘disposable’ society––one that advocates Read more “The Secret To Overcoming Chemistry Addiction”

Live your Dreams

Proof: Chemistry Is Addictive!

I posted a rant yesterday about some questionable ‘expert’ relationship advice floating around the Internet and posed the question, “Is chemistry addictive.” My own opinion is an unequivocal “yes!” I can’t help but wonder what agenda the author I referred to in yesterday’s post had in mind as he penned his dating criteria, but it sparked my interest enough to do some research on my own. While there was certainly no lack of opinions, one in particular struck me. The author writes Glamour Magazine’s male dating column, Ask Jake and, though having read his last post I would probably not agree with his approach, he writes beautifully and I admire him for his candid honesty identifying his own toxic patterns––so much so that I’ve decided to take two days to not only share his post but also add my own two cents and hopefully yours as well.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5aMcOsIJKf4[/youtube]

This video discusses commitment-phobs, male and female, and some views about the issue. While it’s interesting, I have a unique spin on the topic. Today I’ll share Jake’s article and I’d love to hear your comments Read more “Proof: Chemistry Is Addictive!”

Live your Dreams

Is Chemistry An Addiction?

This may be a controversial blog, but I feel compelled to comment on it. I got an email a few days ago that described a teleseminar posted by a “relationship expert” and when I read the content I began to see why so many relationships fail. It’s hard to believe that there are “experts” out there that actually promote toxic information like
this:

  • You have to be very specific in identifying the physical attributes you want in a partner ie: age, height, weight, hair color, physical build, or any other important physical characteristics that are important to you. Chemistry is everything.
  • Because men are so visual in nature, they should seek females who are 5-10 years younger than themselves. So that also means women should date men 5-10 years their senior, the exception being once a females reaches 70 years of age.
  • The more you can pin down exactly what you’re looking for the more control you have over the design of your mate.
  • We need to take better advantage of our circle of friends. We should share with our closest friends what we are looking for, and allow them to duplicate the search effort.
  • In any social setting or event, we should have “wingman”, someone who can introduce us to prospects that we may be looking for, or an additional friend that can identify attendees that match the physical description we are looking for.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUOkBvxSoHw[/youtube]

I almost gaged when I read that. I mean honestly, Read more “Is Chemistry An Addiction?”

Live your Dreams

Remembering Randy Pausch

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BODHsU3hDo4[/youtube]

Ahhh, the summer sun, beach trips, picnics at the park … What a wonderful time of year, but summer will always remind me of something more than lazy summer days. It brings to my mind the life of a man who to me was a true hero. I never knew him, but Randy Pausch was, without a doubt, the epitome of an eternal optimist. If you Read more “Remembering Randy Pausch”

Live your Dreams

The History Of Failed Relationships, Part Deux.

You’d never dive into a shallow pool, right? No one would consciously do that, but people dive right into new relationships every day––without testing the waters first. It’s no wonder so many break their ‘buts’ (yes I meant to spell it that way) But he said . . . But she was . . . But we have . . . Moving too fast, is a sure way to add to your ‘but’ list and chalk up another failed relationship––so if you missed part one in this series, check it out before reading on, because today I’m adding to the top five reasons relationships fail with: The History of Failed Relationships, Part Deux.

How many times have we all heard the cliches, “men are all alike” or “Women! I’ll never understand them?” Maybe we do speak different languages, but honestly people, it’s our differences that keep things interesting.

 

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FAyDmJvjxbg[/youtube]

 

Men (or women for that matter) aren’t all the same and if you have that attitude or experience, then it’s time you look at the common denominator––YOU!
If your relationships continually end the same way, Read more “The History Of Failed Relationships, Part Deux.”

Follow

Get the latest posts delivered to your mailbox: